Has your child ever gotten lost? I remember the ONE time it happened to me. It felt like 2 hours...in reality I have no idea how long he was lost...maybe 2-3 minutes. Let's set the stage shall we...Riley and I were at the mall...he was not quite 2. I was THAT mother. The one at the play area who usually stood by the exit so that all the other moms/kids had to walk around me to enter or exit the area so I could keep watch on my child. I was probably a fire hazard. Can you say OVERPROTECTIVE? I was new to the area and in order not to scare away the ONE mom friend I had, I took her advice and relaxed and sat down with her. What she didn't realize (having a perfectly well behaved daughter the same age) was that my son was notorious for escaping mall play areas. I NEVER took my eyes off of him...no matter what conversation we were having, I never looked at my friend, my eyes were glued to my child who darted from one area to another (like that guy that miraculously speeds across the tennis court retrieving rogue balls at Wimbeldon). When he moved to the side of the play area I couldn't see, I got up, left her mid conversation and watched him, then followed him back to where we were sitting.
As I was watching him, I started fumbling through my purse to get a snack ready for my 19 month old son...a trick to bribe him off the play equipment and lure him home. Both eyes on him, I dug through my giant bag for that darn Kids Clif Bar.....to no avail my hand could not find it unassisted by my eyeballs. I looked down into the bag, for what seemed mere seconds. Success..bar in hand, I looked up to call him over and he was nowhere to be found. PANIC! I remained calm...told my friend I couldn't find my little guy....scanned my eyes over every child in the place, looked in every nook and cranny as she scanned the play area at the mall. Moms could see the worry on my face, but few offered to help. After what seemed like an eternity...thoughts of was he kidnapped, did he go down the escalator, into the department store, where in this gazillion square foot mall could he be...my friend, bless her heart...spotted him 50 feet away playing in those fun car like strollers you can rent. I left everything, my purse, keys and all sense of self in the play area, ran over there, grabbed him and hugged him.
HE HAD NO IDEA I HAD LOST HIM! Surprisingly I never LOST it...I maintained a calm demeanor even though my stomach felt like it was in my throat about to escape my body. Mother of the Year? You decide? I did everything I could to keep my eye on my very active child. THE ONE TIME I decided to sit down instead of block the entrance/exit like a linebacker he got out......guess what. When people tell me I've overprotective or paranoid I think back to that time...and remember the fear, the heartache, the despair, the complete agony of not knowing where the ONE thing you love most in the world was. The one thing I would do anything for...I didn't know where he was for minutes or seconds. I NEVER want to feel that again. I never want to earn that "Mother of the Year" badge again. So I will never stop being overprotective....I will never give into sitting down at the play area with my now 2 year old daughter who will likely pull worse antics than he did...I will never allow that feeling to invade my body, soul, heart and mind as long as I live. MOTY? Yes....it was a bad thing htat happened, that probably most parents suffer through and empathize with...but this one...I'll NEVER be able to laugh about....This is one award I didn't want to win and one I rarely discuss with friends. I still feel like my stomach is going to leave my body when I think of it...5 years later!
Now that said....my friend at work was sharing his story about the Taste of Omaha last weekend. He, his wife and 3 year old precious daughter were there. They were by a large inflatable slide and noticed a 1.5-2 year old boy go down the slide, sprain his ankle and land at the bottom, crying and unable to walk. NO MOM IN SIGHT! When the mom did show up...all she did was show up..yell at the boy...and ask how he got out of his stroller...he'd been there for 10 minutes!!!! My friend's wife explained to the woman that her son was hurt...the woman stormed off w/ her child and never even thanked my friend and his wife for attending to her son. THIS IS NOT MOTY! This is just in my NOT SO HUMBLE opinion...bad parenting. I try my best NOT to judge others...especially mothers. BUT COME ON! How do you allow a 1.5 year old to get out of stroller at a MAJOR city event, take 15 minutes to find him, then not even comfort him or address his injuries! People...have fun, enjoy the city you live in, BUT PLEASE don't drink beer instead of watching you kids....take care of them and drink at home after they're asleep ! That's all I have to say about that!
Keep it positive moms- no judgement of other moms...most of us are doing the best we can...we need each other's support. IF YOU DON'T HAVE SUPPORT, I HIGHLY ENCOURAGE YOU TO GET SOME...MOM'S CLUB INTERNATIONAL, MOPS, MEETUP.COM...there are so many places for you to meet moms just like you! Don't be shy...get out there and meet other moms...it TRULY makes a world of difference!
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